Thursday, June 29, 2017

Taipei

In my mind, Taipei is the city of all cities. It is the epitome of a big city. Objectively, it's not the biggest city in the world or anything (however you want to define a big city), but how I feel about a city isn't based on objective factors. For me, Taipei is THE big city. 


Taipei feels huge and fast-paced to me. Everything seems to be more crowded, businesses and establishments are open so late, and it feels impossible to discover everything about the city. I feel so little. I'm in the presence of something great.
New York City

To me, New York City is a sophisticated city. It's for the best of the best. A race to be the best, a challenge. I love it. I think of really tall buildings in crowded and noisy streets. The crowded and noisy streets make the really tall buildings more impressive. The really tall buildings make the crowded and noisy streets more impressive. Everything is just impressive. I feel wonder. 


To me, NYC is also super cool, edgy, stylish. Trends start there. Ugly things are beautiful and artistic. It makes me want to explore different parts of myself--and the more different, the better. I feel like I will always be young. 


NYC makes me feel excitement. Lots of good, unpredictable things are happening there.

Wednesday, June 28, 2017

I don't like admitting I'm wrong. It's very, very hard for me. With that said, here are some things that I have been wrong about recently. I'm admitting it.

-I thought that the animal shelter that I visited with my dad and sister was a kill shelter. I told them that, before and after we visited. I just assumed that that's how all animal shelters work. I was wrong. The animal shelter that we visited is no-kill. (Which is a relief to me, after seeing those animals!)


-I've been reading about the Bachelor In Paradise controversy involving alleged sexual assault. At first, I thought that the guy must be guilty in some way. After reading more about it, I changed my mind. I don't think he did anything illegal or even remotely illegal. As far as I know, I was wrong about him.


-My mom came back from Taiwan and bought a dress from there, for either me or my sister to claim. I took one look at it and dismissed it. I tried it on anyway. When I tried it on, I quickly realized that I was wrong for rejecting it! It fit me like a glove and looked good on me. Right away I thought about how it would be really nice to get more clothes from Taiwan, since this dress fit me so well.

Monday, June 26, 2017

San Francisco 

I am not really a city girl. I don't know what I am. A floater, maybe. I think I could hypothetically be okay living in a big city, suburb, small town, or farm. I don't believe I have a very strong preference for living in any one of these areas over the others.


So even though I'm not really a city girl, some cities simply make me feel so much (in a good way). When I think about them, when I think about being there...I feel something special. It's kind of a romantic feeling, but not exactly that either.


San Francisco is one of these cities. New York City is another one too (maybe I'll talk about it in the future). Taipei too. 


San Francisco is a dreamy city to me. It makes me think of the past, of longing, and of youthful idealism. 


Maybe it's because of the image of the clouds on the Golden Gate Bridge, the fog surrounding the city, the liberalism, the intriguing Pacific Ocean. I don't know.


Anyway, I just feel lucky that I get to feel so much. Some of my most special feelings come from the mystique and glamour of big cities.

Sunday, June 25, 2017

Cooking 

There is something about cooking for someone. There is something about having someone cook for you. I would almost call it magical. 


It's not purely about the taste of home-cooked food, or the admirable effort and thought that goes into home-cooked food, or that home-cooked food is healthier (maybe) and cheaper than pre-made food...

Cooking warms the heart because it is such a tangible way of showing people that you enjoy taking care of them. Not just that you can take care of them and will do it, but that you actually enjoy it too.
Friendly chat 

-We were in a heat wave last week! I'm glad it's over now. 


-I've been enjoying my weekends. I'm not sure how the time can go by so fast doing absolutely nothing, but it does. I sleep, I eat, I watch random things on YouTube, I surf the internet...do some errands/chores...and then I sleep.


-I visited an animal shelter with my dad and sister last week for Father's Day. We were not looking to get a dog, but just learning more. Seeing those dogs broke my heart. I tried not to get attached and greatly limited my interaction with them, but still! I've just been thinking about those dogs, and dogs generally, because of that trip. I'm not in a place in my life right now to get a dog though. Someday, hopefully.


-I went to a jazz class last week and the teacher said something that really resonated with me. She said that we will never be at a place in dance and in life generally, when we can say, "I'VE ARRIVED!" (as in, I've made it, I know what I'm doing now). So we should just always embrace the moment right now :). 

Saturday, June 24, 2017

Humbleness struggle 

I have this thing. It's a really big thing in my life. Really big. 


Are you ready? 


I have this thing about wanting to be well-liked by a lot of people. I want to be popular! 


I want everyone to be mesmerized by my beauty and charm!


This attitude sure isn't right.

Friday, June 23, 2017

Thankfulness should be constant. Here are some things that I am thankful for:

-Hot showers. I love to feel clean. 


-Air conditioning. We're in a heat wave. 


-Using pure shea butter as lotion. I currently have four shea butter products that I regularly use. I love shea butter!


-Ice cream. I just discovered and really enjoyed eating Haagen-Dazs' Coffee Almond Crunch ice cream bars this last week. 

Thursday, June 22, 2017

A new goal

Goals are good. They keep us young! They're a bit scary too (what if I don't reach them? I don't want to be disappointed about not having something. I also don't want to feel like a failure). But I think the fear is the part that keeps us young!


My new goal is pretty simple. It's just a little something more to add to the back of my mind at times. 


It's to befriend someone who is much older than me, and someone who is significantly younger than me. That's two people. The level of friendship I'm looking for in both cases is being able to hang out one-on-one, for fun. 


I hope it happens!!!

Wednesday, June 21, 2017

Steady 

Not shaken up often 

Almost always in the same good state 
An inner stability 
Takes constant effort

Monday, June 19, 2017

Plans 

Lots of possibilities 

They make me excited 
I can't do everything though
I choose the best to do
Then look forward to it

Sunday, June 18, 2017

Morning 

Wonderful day ahead 

Lots of possibilities 
Promising
Soak it all in

Saturday, June 17, 2017

No plan

Deliberately no commitment 

Possibilities become more exciting
Whatever ends up happening
You're already satisfied 
A gift to yourself
Friday night 

Tired

Happy
Celebratory 
Low-key

Friday, June 16, 2017

One year ago 

One year ago (generally speaking, not specifically today)...I was kind of okay. In some ways I was okay, and in some ways I wasn't okay.


Yeah. I wasn't completely one way or the other. But this answer is better than the answer I would have given last year, and all the years of my life before then since I've been old enough to think about this. Back then, my answer would have pretty much always been, "One year ago I was struggling", or worse, "One year ago I was in bad shape." 


So I'm pretty happy with my answer today.

Thursday, June 15, 2017

Loyalty

What is the heart of loyalty? 


Loyalty means sticking with someone or something, even when it's incredibly difficult to. 


It's about living for something greater than yourself. 


I don't think I'm a disloyal person by any means, but I'd like to be a more loyal person.

Wednesday, June 14, 2017

Security

Stable

No danger 
Everything is okay and will be okay 
A safe bubble 
Nice to have from time to time

Monday, June 12, 2017

After yesterday's post, the natural topic for today's post is...new things (to me) that I have realized that I am good at! Here it is:

-I am good at singing on pitch when I concentrate. I have perfect pitch. I don't have a strong voice or big vocal range, but I can sing perfectly on key, and when I do that, it sounds good. I've known for awhile that I have perfect pitch, but I didn't know until recently how good this could make my singing sound. 


-I am good at being fairly open-minded/non-judgmental about people. It's about ultimately valuing people just for who they are as humans, and nothing else. This was a trait I developed. 


-I am good at convincing people of things through rational points. I am usually right in these situations. As long as I can get my emotions under control, I am good at this. 


That's it for now!

Sunday, June 11, 2017

As I go through life, my perception of myself changes. I see new good and bad things about myself. Here are some new things (to me) that I have realized that I am bad at:

-I am not good at interior decorating. I thought I would be good at it. It seems crafty and feminine and like something I would be good at. Myers-Briggs said I would be good at it (I'm an ISFJ). But I'm not good at it. I don't have an innate sense of style here.


-I am not good at standing up for myself. Okay, I always knew this, but I didn't realize just how bad I was. 


-I am not good at getting people excited about things. I am not a good promoter. I would be a terrible saleswoman for this reason. This is sad, because this is a skill that is beneficial in so many situations. 


That's it for now!
Beauty 

Magical

Desirable 
The best of the best
At the top
For this moment 

Saturday, June 10, 2017

Friday 

Nearing the end 

Relax a little 
And also push even harder 
Friday is a well-earned reward

Thursday, June 8, 2017

Using my brain really well

I've talked about how I am both good and bad at using my brain/being rational and logical. 


The one situation (a big one) where I struggle with using my brain is when I'm feeling insecure. I let my feelings take over. 


I think a lot of it has to do with lack of self-control. Anyway, I think I'm getting better at this now. 
Variety 

Fresh

Colorful
Wonderful 
Relaxing 

Wednesday, June 7, 2017

Monday, June 5, 2017

I want to take a solo trip somewhere. Somewhere fun that I've never been to before. I'm not opposed to joining multi-day group tours. But I want it to ultimately be a solo trip in that I want to be in charge and call all the shots (such as deciding the destination, for how long, which tours to go on, basically everything). 

I want it to be a super fun trip. What exactly super fun means for me, I don't know what that is yet, but I trust that it'll come to me in time! 
I like being a girl

I'm not just proud to be female and proud of what females can accomplish (I'm a feminist). I really enjoy being female too. I really enjoy fulfilling a role in this world that only females can. It makes me feel special and lovely.

Saturday, June 3, 2017

Ode to time

Time gives us perspective 

Time reveals how things really are 
Time shows us what's really important 
Time heals us
Be kind 

Give

Share 
Put a piece of yourself out there
As much as you can 
And then a little more

Thursday, June 1, 2017

Spontaneous 

Different 

Abrupt 
Spending energy 
Exciting