Thursday, September 1, 2016

I feel compelled to explain just how ridiculous our soon-to-again-be houseguest is. I don't actually know anything about his upcoming stay because he doesn't give us any information, but let me explain to you a little about how his stay was last year:

He stayed in our house for about a month last year, except for the days when he was on his other trips-within-a-trip or when he was at his work conference.

He's from a foreign country. He doesn't drive. When he stayed at our house, my mom drove him everywhere. Every single day. She can do this because she doesn't work. They hung out a lot together. She planned excursions with him. She drove him so he could go running in the hills every day.

On the days he stayed at our house, my mom planned every single meal for him (I'm assuming).

I had to plan some excursions with him as well, show him around. Obviously not as much as my mom.

I never heard him thank us, not one time. To his credit, he did express great enjoyment for everything that we did for him. But I never once heard, "Thanks."

I think he thought that he was repaying us, no, actually that WE should be the ones grateful for his stay here, because:

1) He prayed for us heavily, and he's a very special prayer warrior. I cannot fully comment on his prayer life and what exactly that means. But on the other hand, the way he talked about spirits and demons and angels and stuff...honestly, it freaks me out!

2) At the ripe old age of being in his thirties, he has infinite wisdom and intelligence, of all sorts, to impart on everyone. I think he thought that he was some kind of special counselor to all, really superior to everyone in many ways.

I was a main target because I was obviously going through some internal struggles at the time (though not anything he could remotely understand or could help me with or needed to help me with). He forced his opinions of me, on me, and shoved them down my throat. 

I was already in the middle of a lot of internal struggles, and I didn't have the capacity to keep fighting him on this, even though I knew how wrong he was about everything and in the way he talked to me. Among the MANY things he kept telling me, about myself, were that:

I'm close-minded, I have tunnel vision, I don't have enough knowledge of current culture and reality, I made too incorrect assumptions about life in the past when I was growing up that I don't know how to undo now.

So I need to interact with him more to fix the way my mind works, and I need to take advantage of his short time with us.

He also told me that I care too much about, am too invested in, my immediate family and I shouldn't make it such an important part of my life (like him); I'm not interested in some members of my extended family enough; I don't have enough friends (even though I was one of only a few people making an effort to actually introduce him to new people!); he stated that he's smarter than me; he implied that I'm just a silly, romantic girl and that it's a phase; he stated that I have low self-esteem; he asked me in a really mean way, "why would Jesse like you?", because he was convinced that he had my personal life all figured out and wanted to prove a point.

This gives you somewhat of an understanding of what he was like towards me, when he was here. Then, there were the emails he kept sending me after he left, which I won't go into.

Even though he may not consciously realize it, he was kicking me while I was down. I think he did it because deep-down, he's really insecure, and he wanted to feel good about himself and how he has answers.

But this doesn't justify what he did.

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