One of the people I most dislike in this world is a distant relative. He stayed in our house for about a month last year. I don't know why he was here for so long. He was here for a few days for a work conference. As for why he was here for the rest of the time, I can't speculate.
But what I can talk about were his actions towards me. He was incredibly convinced that he had me all figured out, that my life was very horrible, and that he had great solutions for me.
He really pushed these things in my face. Since he lived in our house, I could not avoid this.
I never asked him for his opinions of me or his "help." When he saw that I wasn't responsive to his opinions and advice for me, he got downright extreme in his tactics. He said some pretty horrible things to me, in a horrible way, to try to get me to listen to him. He was "persistent" about "helping" me.
Well, being the pushover that I am, I didn't really say too much back and tell him how out-of-line he was. Plus, I figured he would be leaving soon.
Then after he left, he started sending me emails. Following up with me. He still wanted to "help" me. I politely responded in the beginning. But when his emails didn't stop, my responses got shorter, or I simply didn't respond at all.
Finally, months after he had left, I sent him a very direct email to not push his opinions about me, on me anymore. He responded by...you guessed it. Still firmly insisting that he was right about me. He reiterated to me again that one of my flaws was being close-minded, and then he used this so-called weakness against me by concluding that this was the reason I could not accept his advice. He's very clever in how he argues with people.
Anyway, I just didn't respond to his last email. That was several months ago.
So, yesterday I found out that he's coming over for a month again. There's a good chance that he will spend it primarily at our house. I thought that it was a one-time deal, last year. I guess not.
Maybe he's changed, but I doubt it. People don't change significantly, that quickly.
When I found out that he's going to be here for a month again, I went nuts. Both in my head, and in action.
I wrote him two emails yesterday. I made it very clear that I don't want to interact with him while he's here (but I did throw in "enjoy your visit"). I also told him to keep his strong opinions about me to himself.
I guess I cried yesterday because I remembered how horrible it felt for me when he was here last year (for a MONTH), and because I can't believe that this is my life.