Saturday, August 20, 2016

What makes someone an adult

I don't feel terribly mature for my age. 

I guess there are a lot of ways we can define someone or ourselves as finally being an "adult." A lot of these are external factors.

But I don't think external factors necessarily mean anything. They can, but they don't have to. 

For me, the distinction rests on something else. It rests on seeing my parents as people, who are just as flawed as me. And accepting this. 

I've heard that this is what marks the transition into adulthood. 

I thought I understood what it meant to see and accept my parents as people, and not just these "mythical people." 

I recognized that both of my parents had flaws, some of which affected me greatly, and I was at peace with everything. 

I'm beginning to realize that even with this insight, I was only halfway there.

I think it's taking this insight one step further...understanding and accepting that my parents actually have an infinite number of flaws, that it's bottomless. They're people. Not just slightly flawed mythical people. But, very, regular, average-y, Joe Shmoe's.

This isn't meant to be degrading or insulting to them. It just means...they're people.

I never understood why so many people used this state as a benchmark for being an adult.

But now I have thoughts on the matter. They are: 

I think it's because you no longer see yourself as being "under" your parents anymore. You're on the same level as them. 

So you're an adult. 

At the same time, you have to accept them for who they are. There's no bitterness towards them, despite all their flaws. You still see them as your parents, special people in your life with a special role, not just ANY regular people. 

You still have a heart. So you're a person, still. An adult person. 

Okay, I think I get it now.

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