My secret wish
Okay, this makes me smile. Just thinking about this makes me smile. I guess that's how I know...this really is my wish :).
I don't think I'm the type of dancer who would be big on being in group performances. I don't think I would be against it, but it wouldn't really be the best thing ever for me. Strangely enough, even though I'm really shy and don't like drawing attention to myself, I think it's the solo performances that I'd be into. Weird, huh.
The audience size doesn't really matter to me. Big or small would be fine. Big would be cool, because, if you're performing, you might as well perform for a big crowd, and there's more energy/excitement in the air. Small would be nice too, because it feels more intimate and real, and that's always nice.
I think WHO is in the audience would be important to me though. I would want at least some people in the audience to be people I know well, people I care about. I would want to share and enjoy this with them.
In case you can't tell, I have a lot of emotions in me. I'm just brimming with them. I'm emotional by nature, and I don't shy away from emotional situations or experiences. So...there's a lot. I think most people who meet me can probably sense that I'm an emotional sort of person, to varying degrees. It depends on how people meet me or know me.
But it's really hard for people to know the depth of the emotions I experience.
But that's what dancing allows me to do. I can just concentrate on showing my emotions. If I had the steps down, that's all I would have to focus on. The only thing.
And I have a lot of things to express :). Sadness, pain, beauty. It's all mixed in together. Deep emotions are not only intense, but layered; multi-faceted.
That's why I would want to do solo performances. It would just be me and my emotions, revealed. It would be really intimate. And that's beautiful. And that's what everyone is looking for too.